Emma’s Dilemma: A little deflation should not cause this much pressure


Newspaper adviser Damien Tippett

Editor and chief Emma Fernandez.

It is illegal to wear a mustache to church in Alabama if it is likely to provoke laughter.

It is illegal to walk your cow down Main Street after 1 p.m. on Sunday in Little Rock, AR.

In Salem, WV, it is illegal to eat candy less than half an hour before church.

And deflating footballs before using them in a National Football League (NFL) game is cheating.

All of these may seem ridiculous, but laws and rules are not created out of politicians’ imaginations. Someone, somewhere, at sometime had to have done something to provoke these wry rules and regulations.

And I find that humorous.

We can only imagine the mustache a person was wearing that brought on so much laughter in an Alabama church that the state made it illegal.

Or the guy who was always bringing his cow down Main Street at 1:05 p.m. in Little Rock.

Or what wicked things those kids did in church that one Sunday in Salem that made eating candy right before church illegal.

Or what NFL team deflated the footballs in an NFL game.

As none of us were there, we can only imagine.

Except for the deflated footballs of course. We are all here, right now, living through Deflategate. What a time to be alive! Won’t this be a great story to tell the grandkids in 50 years? “I lived through Deflategate.”

Of course not. And that’s my point.

Deflategate has been one joke after another. The media and fans alike have sensationalized  the jabs at Tom Brady and Patriots and the deflated balls jokes.

And who cares? Tom Brady has obviously proved he can play football with regularly inflated balls in his last two games. Just like cow guy probably walked his cow down Main Street at 12:55 p.m.

Overall, the media and fans have made the NFL, Tom Brady, and the Patriots a laughing stock.

Deflategate is one big joke.

But hey, at least now we know not to deflate footballs in the NFL, right?

Except that that is about as ridiculous as telling citizens of Oklahoma they cannot let their donkeys sleep in bathtubs after 7pm.